Rod, my favourite Viking, called today to tell me he wanted to take me on a little creative journey.
He did a gallery tour of Seattle and thought it would be more fun if I was there and that it would even be more fun if we went to Portland for a few days.
I told him I was retiring my status as a fun weekend date. I was cutting my hair, putting on painty sweat pants, blowing my nose on my sleeve and signing up for the Legion Bingo games.
Lovely Viking said that would be even better because no one else would pay attention to me. He bought and refurbished an antique projector to go with the antique films he gave me last year.
He has this fantastic collection of felted monsters in his little Smart Car and lots of wicked finger puppets to play with. He collects incredible places to eat and drink. Waters me wth hot sake and aquavit. And hand feeds me things like candied hibiscus flowers and juniper soda.
I told him I was tempted but I was still throwing up and if he planned on kidnapping me he would have to keep me in his beautiful house on the beach. And that I was going to out the fact that he liked pitiful women artists. He agreed and said something in Danish that sounded appropriately rude.
So Seattle it is. With a rude Viking. When I can find my glasses.